Let me ask you a question:
Let’s say I’m writing a story email selling a physical product.
Such as… car rotisseries?
And I’m starting the email with a story to capture your attention. Which of these stories would you want to read:
ONE
***
You’re working on a 2.94-ton Toyota Hilux.
But your back is killing you from over 20 hours of bending and crawling under the car to weld. So, you bought a car rotisserie to make your life easier.
The only problem is…
The wobbly rotisserie is shaking on top of you when you’re working UNDER the car.
Your life flashes before your eyes like a Final Destination movie as you tell yourself –
“I deserve a BETTER rotisserie.”
***
TWO
***
You’re working on a 2.94 Toyota Hilux.
But your back is killing you from over 20 hours of bending and crawling under the car. Pain is shooting through your spine like being shocked by an electric pod. Your muscles are cramping together, tearing the tissues apart. You can hear the body screaming with pain… or maybe you are screaming?
You can’t even stand up straight.
So, you bought a car rotisseries to make your life easier.
The only problem is…
The wobbly rotisserie is shaking on top of you when you’re working UNDER the car. Suddenly…
*SNAP*
You hear a terrifying sound of metal breaking like a twig…
*CLUM-CUM-CLUM*
Over 2 tons of heavy metal comes crashing down as you try to escape.
*BOOM*
You can’t see what happened with the dust in the air…
But you know something’s wrong.
You can’t feel your feet. There’s blood everywhere. Your life flashes before your eyes… like a Final Destination movie.
The last thought in your mind –
“I should have bought a better rotisserie.”
***
The idea is: You can execute a story really well—with tons of details and vivid word-painting—yet no one will want to read that story.
Because it makes people uncomfortable.
When people struggle to enjoy your story… out of stress and horror… they bail (and won’t buy from you).
Writing/Reading story emails should be entertaining.
You must find the balance between just enough details… without making the story agony to read.
Or… you can hire a professional email storyteller to do it for you.
(hint: I know a guy >> this one)
Cheering for you,
Wuyen